OkcPets Magazine September 2023

September / October 2023 • OKC Pets 17 Miscellaneous Meanings What’s black and white and red all over? AN EMBARRASSMENT OF PANDAS Pandas urinate as high as possible to mark territory and fake how tall they are. They achieve that by doing handstands against a tree. Then they climb the tree. This hardly qualifies as efficient to me, but it does add weight to the term “embarrassment.” AN INFESTATION OF LICE (IMHO, the one who decided on that term had little imagination)…. A school of fish…. If you think YOU feel lousy, don’t complain to a red snapper. There is an aquatic bug out there called Cymothoa exigua, or tongue-eating louse. It enters a fish’s body through the gills, hooks into the tongue, and severs the blood ves- sels. The tongue dies and falls off, while the parasitic louse sets up shop as a new tongue until the fish dies — although it could actually still have a normal life span. Photos of this phenomenon give new meaning to the idea that a picture is worth a thousand words, especially considering how hard it would be to talk with a lousy tongue. BTW: A lawsuit against a supermarket chain in Puerto Rico claimed poisoning resulted from having ingested a louse from inside a snapper. The suit was dropped when it was proved that louses aren’t poisonous and are consumed in some cultures. A FLOCK OF CHICKENS A rare breed of Indonesian chicken called the Ayam Ce- mani possesses a hyperpigmentation gene causing fibromelanosis. The feathers, beaks, internal organs, and bone and muscle tissue are all black. Many people call them goth chickens. Interesting note: I have no clue what color the meat becomes when cooked, but these chickens lay cream-colored eggs and have red blood. Go figure. A CONFUSION OF GIRAFFES A clowder of cats…. Giraffes have black tongues with a sticky saliva that’s an antiseptic. Giraffes chew acacia leaves (and therefore the thorns that the tree is known for), so they probably developed the antiseptic for protection from bacterial infections. Cats have a substance much like deter- gents, which probably helps keep their fur clean — but they have a wide variety of very toxic bacteria too, which can kill other animals if it dries on their feathers or fur and they groom. A CHARM OF HUMMINGBIRDS These guys are so cool, I’m going to fire off several fun facts about them. They eat three times their weight daily (I wanna be a hummingbird). They are the only bird that can fly backward. They have a big brain-to-body ratio and are believed to be quite intelligent. Their brain makes up more than 4 percent of their body weight. (Human brains make up only 2 percent — some even less, if you ask me.) They can remember every flower and feeder ever visited, as well as when to return for more nectar. They go into torpor to sleep fully, which helps when the temperature drops because it saves energy. It’s also a near-death level, and it takes as long as an hour for them to fully wake. A CARAVAN OF CAMELS Built to last, camels can live as long as 50 years when cared for. They are desert-proof because their humps store fat to cover several days’ worth of survival. They have two sets of eyelashes and a third lid and the ability to seal their nostrils, all of which protects them in a sandstorm. These ungulates can drink more than 50 gallons of water in three minutes, leading me to theorize that they are reincarnated fraternity dudes. The term “camel” is Arabic for beau- ty (insert juvenile snicker). I’m betting, though, that this animal is life-saving in dire circumstances, lending cause for such flattery. Wanna Live Forever? A SMACK OF JELLYFISH When facing stress, such as starvation or injury, the jellyfish Turritopsis dohrnii can reverse maturity and become a baby version of itself — like a butterfly sneaking back into its old cocoon, becoming a caterpillar again. In theory, one could live forever. This sounds like a genie’s curse when you make your first wish for immortality. The big blue guy snaps his fingers, and poof! — you’re a brainless blob. Eternally! And Even More? You might have guessed that I too sum- moned my inner adolescent to write this — and it was such a hoot, I think I’ll bug the magazine to let me do a Part II. There’s only so much fun to be had these days, and I’m more than game to have it. Or better yet — collect it!